There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
