im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
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