they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
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