Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
Still dying that you shit outside
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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