I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
The air taste purple.
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