Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
Randomize