my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
what is it with giant penises always finding me
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
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