my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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