Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
The adults are the big ones right?
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
Randomize