so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
She took me to ER. She says thought it was a squirtgun filled with vodka and she was 'marking me for later.' Thank god it's a flesh wound, and we're cool and going to date.
gtg, the cops are here
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize
