So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize
