we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
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