it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
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