Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Randomize
