there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
I have so many feelings about this burrito
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
Randomize
