his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize
