I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
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