I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
Randomize
