Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
Randomize
