i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
we're making bets on your personal life
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
May the power of my ass compel you!!
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize