If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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