lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
I had to cum in my sink.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
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