forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
Randomize