So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Randomize
