My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
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