tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
Randomize
