Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
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she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
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Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
Randomize