I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
If you think me talking about that hot guy accepting my LinkedIn request is pornographic, I’m not sure how you’re gonna feel when I tell you I fucked a stranger on a park bench last weekend
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