I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
He pulled a kid having a seizure out of a car and stayed with him until the ambulance came.
he what???
Not kidding. My ovaries cannot handle this shit...swear next time he'll rescue a bunch of pound puppies and hand them out to lonely orphans.
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Randomize
