i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
Just got hit on by a 28-year old, quadraplegic, triple-cancer-survivor redneck. Now updating bucket list to meet newfound standards.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
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