Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Randomize
