i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
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