It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
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