I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Randomize