Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
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