Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
Randomize
