once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
Randomize
