I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
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