Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
