I need help removing her.
No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
