Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
Randomize
