My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
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