he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
