Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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