No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
