Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
The cards I get dealt on tinder now are karma for fucking a married man while I was in high school.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize
