in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
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