I wannas sexs uuuuu
He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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