I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
Turns out that my surprise "happy birthday" drop-in for my dad turned into a "my parents like afternoon sex a lot" realization.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
