this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
Randomize
