The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
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