he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
Randomize