So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
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I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
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I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Randomize